How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
