If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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