No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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