love makes seman taste better
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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