put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
