that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Randomize
