whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
