so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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