Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
