That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
