In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
