And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
