I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
why does every cop we meet know your name?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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