it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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