the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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