he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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