Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
