The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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