I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Can you bring me the toilet please
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
