Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
sarcasm needs its own font
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
