The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
