I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
