I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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