piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
why is half of my head shaved?
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