She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
