you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
