Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
