I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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