This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize