i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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