wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
