a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
