Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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