Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
