party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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