Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just found puke in my bra..
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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