We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Randomize
