SEEEEXXX PLEASE
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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