I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize