i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
wrigley field is MILF paradise
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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