got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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