What did we do last night that was yellow?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
