Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
