and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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