I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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