Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Blood and glitter go together right?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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