I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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