ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
