If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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