girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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