There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I woke up under a house in Key West
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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