I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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