When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize